A New Year

I took an unplanned hiatus from writing in the fall. I will explain it all a bit more in an upcoming post, but I have no regrets AND I am eager to get back to my “Farmers Market and Library” project. Finishing this is a goal of mine for Q1 2024 and I am glad you are here to be a part of it– despite my lackadaisical, inconsistant approach to it.

“Goal for Q1” sounds very corporate. But, I like goals and decided to break this year down into quarters versus looking at the whole year as things I want to accomplish or experience in hopes of working with smaller, attainable goals. And, also being able to cross things off a list consistently helps me and my mental momentum.

In the very public age of social media and influencer culture, opinions about goals and resolutions are everywhere. Especially right now. I know there are people who are very “anti” New Year’s resolutions. (I live with one of such people.) And, I know it’s not necessarily helpful or healthy for everyone to make a list of things to seemingly “do more” of. But, I like the energy of the end of a year and the beginning of a new one.

Even with all its faults, if you share your reflections or resolutions on the internet, I am going to joyfully consume every little bit. I genuinely love hearing people consider their wins and loses of a year and hopes for the next one. Keep sharing them. It doesn’t even have to be just this week. All of winter is a slower time for reflections of all sorts.

One of my favorite things that I have been devouring online recently is the trend of creating an “In and Out” list for 2024. I like them because every list is so different it makes it clear this is personal. It’s makes everyone the own tastemaker of their lives versus making a claim for the wider “everyone” which is special, fun, and important.

You should be the tastemaker of your own life and engage with things that feel good and while letting go of things that don’t. These “In and Out” lists are not so much an “to-do” list full of goals and action items, but a list of desired ways of being and how to really lean in to what that means for you.

So, obviously I had to hop on the trend before I get back on my regularly scheduled program of a Tuesday “What I know” and Friday “What I Ate.” A few of these– especially if they are in the realm of lessons learned or food– have notes.

Let me know if any of this sounds good to you or perhaps what is “In and Out” for you in 2024. Happy New Year!

In

Caviar on a potato chip: This is part literal, part metaphor. We went to Napa in early December and it felt like nearly everywhere we were greeted with caviar. This was fun because it’s a little fancy, but we also had never had it before. We learned that caviar is often served with a blini, or a small little coin-sized pancake, and a dollop of creme fraiche. Potato is also a great compliment to caviar and an easy hack is to place a little creme fraiche and caviar right on a potato chip. (New York Housewives did this recently, too!) It’s great tasting, so do try it. But, for me it’s also the idea of incorporating “Little Luxuries” in my day to day. A sprinkle of maldon salt on a chocolate chip cookie, using the candle or a nice smelling shower bomb, topping some stovetop popcorn with parmesan and herbs. If you are familiar with “high/low” fashion, this idea is sort of adjacent. It is the mixing of something a little more fun, unexpected, and maybe even a little fancy in your every day.

Organization- I got myself a label maker in 2023 and I think it gave me a whole new personality. It was part of the reason for my hiatus this fall, honestly. Eager to keep this ball rolling and develop the right systems in our house.

Learning new things

Veggies at breakfast

Privacy

Cheering others on

Booking the trip

Real photo albums- A true “To-Do” of mine. I plan to put my ossified Yearbook Editor muscle to work and use Canva. (Did you know Canva was first created to help with school yearbook design? True story.) I would love to have two complete books by the end of the year. I also grabbed this photo scanner at the end of the year to digitize a lot of my old photos. In going through my old school boxes of high school prints for some of the images in “Farmers Market and Library” I was struck by how there are some photos that I would be really sad to lose if, like, the house burned down.

Mild (Healthy! Fun!) delusion 

Finishing— the project, the goal, the ahem… you know.

Dates— with friends, lovers, and yourself 

Stretching- Another real “goal” of the year. I want to try to do a ten minute Peloton stretch class each night before bed. I go through periods of trying to make this happen often, but this year I want to stick to it.

Writing freehand before typing

Using what you have

Keeping perspective 

Dopamine decor- When we moved, a lot of friends asked me if I was excited to decorate a new home. Of course! And, it has been fun. But, often times that question would be followed up with a “What’s your style?” Best I could muster was a “Nancy Myers inspired hybrid of transitional, light and airy California farmhouse with touches of moody, dark academia.” A mouthful. But, now I think I have landed on it with “Dopamine Decor,” or the idea of decorating your space with whatever feels great to you. Not what HGTV says or what Home Goods is showing or what you see in all the Mormon Mommy Influencers “Forever Homes.” I am loving collecting things that make me happy and especially finding places for the things I love that I already own– even if it isn’t “Trendy” or even something that perfectly matches. It is making our home a true reflection of our family and being home is pleasurable and satisfying.

Having conversations with strangers

Sharing good music, stories, and sunsets

Libraries and farmers markets…!

Out

“Needing” a drink

2x TikTok- In one manic morning in early December, I found myself on the treadmill watching Christmas gift guides on 2x speed on TikTok. It was an insane moment of optimizing consumption of all kinds and almost made me feel sick. No more 2x.

Assumptions- I recently heard someone share the idea of making “Charitable Assumptions” and I loved this idea of flipping the narrative to assuming great things about someone. Or even just giving people more benefit of the doubt. Maybe she isn’t cold, maybe she is tired or just thinking about something else. Maybe he isn’t an idiot, maybe he is scared. In a political fueled year, I feel like this is going to be put into practice a lot and is an idea worth sharing.

Mindless spending

Going to bed late

Girly = Vapid – This is work I have been untangling myself from for years and have written about a lot. The idea of being a cool, chill girl versus just a girl. Of liking what I like. Of not “shoulding” all over myself with antiquated thoughts on what a “Mom should…” or a “woman in the workplace should…” like or do or wear. One thing that really pushed this over the edge was all the Taylor Mania this year. So many of my friends who never were into her finally seemed to get into it and it’s been so fun sharing the love and joy of Taylor Swift with my nearest and dearest. Deep in a group text discussion a friend asked how I knew so much about the history, lore, lyrics, etc. and not in a condescending way. I wasn’t totally sure how to respond beyond the fact that I have been “studying” her since 2006 and made a joke about not having a postgraduate degree like so many of them, but I had this. Then it kind of hit me: If I had this kind of knowledge about, like… The Rolling Stones or Ray Charles or Dave Matthews, I would be, well to quote the one and only Taylor Swift, The Man.

Aging = undesirable – I read this quote from Coco Chanel recently: “No one is young after forty, but one can be irresistible at any age.” Aging is living, baby!

Dumb = Cute 

AI art

Labels- (Unless it’s off of my label maker.) But… Flashy designer stuff? No thanks.

Underwire

Constant selling

Convenience foods for the kids- Okay. Not totally. The drive thru on occasion is fine and some snacks in the pantry are okay. But, I have been relying on both too much lately. It’s time to teach the kids a little bit more about cooking and different foods. The kids and I talked resolutions for them and they are on board, even opting in to the idea of exploring a new country’s cuisine one night a month.

Goodie bags at kid parties – No more little things, please!

Phone before bed

Hauls

Fast fashion

Trying to do everything all the time

Stark Minimalism- Funny to come after a list with a handful of lines that basically say “less stuff!” But, owning stuff is okay and good, too! (See also: Dopamine Decor.)

Let me know what is “In and Out” for you!