The conversation about trying had a lot of parallels to to the last “leftovers” where I shared the idea of doing the things that future you will thank you for. I explained that effort in a few areas of my life sometimes feels like I can code a series of tasks to yield a particular result.
If I don’t have a third glass of wine, I will sleep better.
If I take time to sweat a little in the morning, I have more energy and tolerance for the after school hustle.
But, of course you can’t code life. Things go sideways, get hard, get busy, get thrown off track. I sometimes call these areas of effort “bumpers” for life. (Think like in bowling.)
Kelly Corrigan recently shared something similar on Instagram Live explaining her mantra of “taking care of the house.” In which, she shared the story of when she first started therapy in her thirties after a bout of panic attacks. Before they could even addressed the panic attacks, her therapist asked if she was getting a good night’s sleep, drinking water, getting outside, etc. Kelly explained that she learned that sometimes we may put up a story around things, but ignoring these basics can make it harder to get back to normal physically, emotionally, and psychologically. So now Kelly imagines it all as “taking care of the house” and recognizes that it’s hard to address bigger issues when these are not taken care of.
I have consumed a lot of Kelly Corrigan content over the years. Her books, her podcast, her random Instagram Lives… Somewhere over the years, I heard her say something in line with “taking care of the house,” but took it even a step further saying, “We live in our heads, we might as well hang nice art.”
Her thought process here was to fill you head (your house!) with not art literally— unless you want to— but, to put care into what you consume. To decorate the place with things that delight you and make you think. To not have piles of junk hanging around or to bring in things you don’t like to look at.
So, we can maintain a house… and also make it a nice place.
Here is some of the “art” that hangs in my “house.”
Influencers– I am a big fan of finding influencers you like to follow that are a little bit older than you. For me, Beth Chappo— an indy native— is great for home decor, food, fashion, and making life bright and fun. Grace Atwood is a great follow for art— fine, fashion, and architecture— and for real talk about skin and bodies in your forties.
(A note on influencers and just social media in general. Edits are good and wise. Go through the list of people and brands you follow every once and awhile. Unfollowing is fine. I have found that in the years I was pregnant, I followed a lot of people and brands that are just no longer relevant. Even influencers I once found interesting are just people I have outgrown or lost interest in. Even if it’s someone you know in real life, you can “hide” their content so that you remain “friends” you just won’t see them in your feed.)
Movies– This is so subjective and can be dated easily. I think it is fun and good to keep a pulse on things, if you enjoy movies. But, I also think it is fun and good to make your own “Comfort Movie” list. Theses are movies that you know will put you in a good mood or make you laugh or feel inspired no matter what. For me, it’s so many of the movies I listed in the “Try” essay. Little Women, Legally Blonde, Gone Girl… I also love the banter in The Social Network and delight in anything Nancy Meyers mainly thanks to the spaces she creates.
Music– The fee for Spotify each month is money Adam and I are more than happy to spend. We really enjoy music. But again, it’s so subjective and also sometimes timely. What we do love is the playlists that Spotify’s algorithm will create based on our listens. We love an Americana Mix (think Brandi Carlile and Kacey Musgraves…) or what my algorhythm deems a “Mellow Mix” which is things like The National, Noah Kahan, and acoustic Taylor Swift and Ed Sheeran. I also have found myself loving and learning of so many new favorites on “Next Ten Songwriters.” It’s emotional and sharp. Great lyrics.
Books– I am tough on books and do not finish a lot to make sure the art in my head is “good.” Gruesome details of murder or intense (not in a good way…) sex are a quick “No thanks” for me. I do like a well researched non fiction read, but if its giving too bleak of an outlook on the world in terms of human behavior, climate, etc. I pass. A few of this years faves: Wild and Precious, Happy Place, Life In Five Senses, Butts, Honey, Baby Mine, The Less People Know About Us, and What She Ate.
And, my most anticipated hold right now is Bright Young Women.
Podcasts: Well, obviously Kelly Corrigan wonders!
What type of “art” do you bring in and hang in you home?
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